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I remember my younger days.

• quick to anger

• easily annoyed

• beyond negative

My father would never understand why.

Why is his son unable to wake up positively? Why is everything a problem?

What's with the constant negativity?

If only I knew...

Something bothered me deep inside.

Something was upsetting me.

Something consumed me.

But I couldn't figure out what exactly.

It seemed like it had become an automatic response... one that I was programmed to act upon in the exact same way every single morning.

Wake up. Be annoyed. Be out of touch. Not want to see a single soul. Not want to talk to anybody. Not want to do anything. Just sulk. Be annoyed. And sulk again.

My entire family knew it. It even became a running joke... "do not bother Julian! He doesn't like to talk in the mornings!".

You don't know how much that triggered me too.

It was an embarrassing time period of my life. It lasted a while. It became so common that people in my family started to associate that mood and overall dynamic with me.

It became part of my identity.

Part of my reputation.

Therefore, if you are someone who tends to be

• easily annoyed

• more negative than not

• quick to trigger (& anger)

Then this letter's for you.

We'll go over different strategies you can start using today to re-program & re-wire your subconscious to not be filled with negativity & anger.

Let's dive in.

You Don't Even Know It

It takes time to notice.

At times, others may be pointing it out and letting you know openly.

Other times, they're more subtle about it.

But that's the thing... why are you relying on others to tell you about you?!

That's the first problem that many encounter, my friends.

We barely know ourselves. We are not in tune with ourselves. We haven't made nor put in the time to figure out about ourselves and thus we rely on others' observations about us to guide our understanding... about us.

How does this make sense you ask?

It doesn't.

In fact, this reminds me of soliciting advice from someone else. They have less context on the situation at hand than you will ever have about your own situation. So when looking for advice... let your 85-year-old self play that role. They (in the future) can do so more accurately given they have the most context, material and overall understanding of your situation.

But that's another letter for another day.

For now... realize that those people who tend to be more negative than positive... tend to not even know that they are being that way.

Why?

2 reasons:

1. It's all they've known. Therefore, anything that isn't part of their "common experience" (i.e. negativity) will feel different, unnatural, and against their core identity.

2. Negativity tends to go hand in hand with stubbornness.

A common example is the words you may be using.

More often than not, the following words are in your vocabulary:

• "Life is unfair..."

• "I hate this. I hate that..."

• "They are treating me poorly"

Here, when using such words you are unintentionally priming your subconscious to be negative and live in a constant state of negativity.

Take for instance the blame you assign to "life" or to "them" — you're avoiding personal responsibility and empowerment, keeping the focus on others' actions.

Or when using "hate" — you're introducing strong negative emotions that overshadow any type of rational thinking. And overall upsetting your body and physical world as a result.

I want to remind you of the spiritual & physical world.

What happens within and inside of you (spiritual) will in turn reflect back to the external world (physical).

Therefore, what you feel inside, will be felt on the outside.

This is why the use of language that paints you as a victim (vs. an owner) of your life puts you into a constant vicious cycle that over time makes it frankly (feel) impossible to get out of.

The more you use this kind of language, the more you reinforce your body to be used to it and to feel as if it is part of your core identity and who you claim to be... all in all making it rather challenging to disengage from it.

Remaining in this cycle guarantees a

• miserable life

• a lack of fulfilment

• never-ending misery & mischief

Is that what you want?

If you know that there is more out there destined for you, then keep reading — this is for you!

The rest of this letter will show you how to stop portraying yourself as a victim, and instead learn how to take ownership of your life.

Why?

Because your world reflects your reality back to you. The more negative you are, the more negative you will construe your entire world to be.

These words habitually condition your mind to perceive and expect difficulties and injustices, rather than opportunities and solutions. The more it goes on, the more natural and automatic your mind will make those associations and perceive them as such.

The sooner you realize it, acknowledge it, and decide to do something about it, the better.

This is your time. Keep reading.

Re-Programming

Let me tell you about Steve Chandler.

From a self-described terrible public speaker to a renowned motivational speaker and mentor; his journey begins by battling personal and professional setbacks.

Today, he teaches the principles of personal responsibility and proactive living.

I recently heard about him in a book I'm reading. They mentioned how Chandler was exactly that — a "terrible public speaker", hopeless, and with no motivation for life.

So how did he suddenly shift?

What changed?

His mindset.

Well, he was coached by someone who guided him towards understanding that his mindset was the issue at hand. The first thing his coach noticed and reflected back to Chandler was his "victim mentality".

That is, his constant ability to see the world as "unfair" and feel victimized by every single situation he found himself in.

Language and perception are the key players here.

Many of us have found ourselves in situation like Chandler... that is, unmotivated, unfulfilled, and unhappy. But the main thing we all have in common in these moments is our perception of the situations.

We tend to immediately see them as external to us. As if something or someone else triggered them and that is why they happened.

And that my friends, is a victim mentality.

Now, Chandler shifted from that to what he calls an "owner" mentality. This is where he started taking full responsibility for his life and choices. It was this fundamental change in perspective (a full 180) that empowered him to actively pursue personal growth and professional development.

So that's the trick here.

You want to find fulfilment and overall happiness in your own life?

Then you need to take full ownership & responsibility of absolutely everything... no matter your own

• situations

• circumstances

• life events & happenings

Whatever is to happen, you have the choice to decide how it is you want to deal with it.

Is it their problem or yours?

The minute you can embrace this perspective shift in every single situation that crosses your path in life is the moment you find true freedom.

This is how you stop feeling powerless.

This is how you start taking control of your life.

This is how you begin to find ample opportunities.

BUT.

Do take into account that saying you're an "owner" doesn't directly make you one.

Chandler didn't simply decide to change his perspective & wait for things to magically happen and shape up. He actively took steps to change his circumstances and focus on solutions rather than on problems. He actively made sure that his mindset was cultivating proactivity, resilience, and a positive, can-do attitude.

He actively embodied this "owner" mentality.

So... what can you do to start actively becoming an owner of your life too?

It all begins with internal language and dialogue.

As mentioned above, language is waaay more important and has an impact on our subconscious in ways that we do not even realize.

Stop blaming external factors.

Every single time something happens in your life — begin by looking inward. Explore the different ways that you may have influenced the situation (even if you inherently didn't!).

Being an owner isn't just about adopting positive thinking at all times, but it involves taking concrete actions that affirm your ability to affect change.

You need to believe it.

This is why we begin with language. Our aim is to prime and condition your subconscious to the point where your body will start making those reactions feel like second nature.

At the start — your body and mind will be used to the typical negative language that reinforces a passive and disempowered view of life. But, if you can commit to paying more attention...

you will start to recognize these patterns & consciously substitute them with empowering language and perspectives!

Consider the following linguistic reframes to start adopting in your life today:

• "I choose to..." vs. "I have to..."

• "I am responsible for..." vs. "It's not my fault."

• "Let's find a solution." vs. "This is just impossible."

• "How can we make this work?" vs. "This will never work."

• "What can I learn from this?" vs. "Why does this always happen to me?"

The re-programming begins the moment you start using these words.

And when you adopt these attitudes:

Owners view the world as a place full of opportunities. They believe that every single challenge or setback is a chance to learn and grow.

Want to become an owner of your life?

Be on the lookout at all times for ways to leverage situations to your advantage.

Owners feel empowered to make decisions and take actions that affect their lives. They believe in their own ability to impact their environment and circumstances positively.

Want to become an owner of your life?

Believe you are one. But don't fake it. Feel it.

Owners maintain a positive outlook and focus on taking proactive steps to achieve their intentions.

Want to become an owner of your life?

Stop wasting time complaining or dwelling on what went wrong; instead, look forward and move on with actionable plans.

I've said this before & I will say it again:

You have absolutely nothing to lose trying this.

But, everything to gain.

It may seem tough at the start.

It may seem unproductive.

It may seem like it's going nowhere.

But again... notice — "seems". It's all perception!

I tell you genuinely... at the start, I felt like it was going nowhere. But, I kept trying. I kept dreaming every day. I kept journaling every day. I continued to train my mind to see things as an "owner"... and I finally can say proudly that I catch myself every single time I want to use "hate" or "they" and directly substitute it.

It's all baby steps.

The next step for me will be to automatically start using the owner's language without needing to substitute... but again baby steps. The #1 mistake we can all make here is expecting us to use owner language effortlessly from the very beginning.

Nothing goes from 0 to 100, friends. 

Remember that.

So as you start to adopt this new technique into your life, remember this:

The 1% Rule

I'm sure many of you have heard this before.

But, if you haven't... focus every single day on bettering yourself by 1%.

So ask yourself this question every night as you reflect on your day:

If you can focus on bettering yourself by just 1% every single day, that is a 365% improvement by next year at this time.

That's huge!

Therefore, remember to not get frustrated if things don't start to shape up instantly. It takes time. And in the same way that you learned all the negative behaviours, you need to unlearn them... to then be able to learn the positive ones.

Remember the 3 key pillars:

• Patience

• Consistency

• A superiority complex

Believe you have the ability to do it, believe that you're the best at doing it, allowing you to remain consistent every single day while you patiently wait for the results to come in.

You can do it, my friends.

I believe in you.

Thanks for reading!

Much love,

Julian

PS. I'm working with individuals in improving their mindset to live a more fulfilling life.

If this sounds like you:

• constant negativity

• everything is a problem

• can't seem to find happiness or motivation

Reply directly back to this email with the word “owner”, let’s talk.

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